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We attended my oldest son's graduation last night. As a parent, this has been one of the proudest moments of my life as I watched him develop into an 18-year-old young man that is beginning to step into adulthood. It is also one of the saddest moments of my life as I realize that my son is no longer a child and is one step closer to stepping out on his own and pursuing the path that God calls him to.

Every parent hears the cliche "life moves fast" or "it goes by in a blink." The sad reality is that we hear those words but do not fully grasp their meaning until we see them unfold in front of our eyes. 18 years later, I can remember the very first time I held Nolan and felt the wave of emotions that a first-time father experiences. There are so many memories as he developed through the years. It isn't a cliche - this happened way too fast.

What grey hair and age have taught me is that life can too easily slip by us in a blur. We get so incredibly busy working hard to support a family, maintain a great marriage, raise children, friends, family, hobbies.... There is so much that competes for our attention!

As a man, I can too easily fall into the trap of letting my work become my identity. Some of this due to our culture, where the man is viewed as the "breadwinner." I found incredible success in the logistics field. I was good at solving the crazy puzzles that the fuel industry and supply chain throw at you. As a result, I climbed the corporate ladder and was doing very well financially. During that time, I would do whatever my job required. Long hours, early mornings, answer emails or texts at all hours of the day... I had arrived at the point to where my identity as a man was my job as a Logistics Manager. 

Having a blessed career is not a bad thing. I look back and see God's blessings on my hard work, where he opened up some amazing doors for me. The trap that we have to avoid is that our jobs do not define us. Jobs come and go too easily. What should define us is our family. I am loved by God. I am a husband to an amazing wife. I have the incredibly honor of raising 6 wonderful children. That is who I am and my identity.

When we have our identity placed in the correct order, it helps us prioritize the most precious thing we have in our lives - time. We gladly slow everything down to ensure that we capture the moments that truly matter. We do not exhaust every ounce of energy everything else, and give our wife and kids the leftovers. Instead, they should get the very best of us. 

Take some time to look at your children and reflect for a moment. Are you happy with the pace of your life? Are you pausing enough to make memories and enjoy the little moments that make life worth living? If you are not happy with those answers, make the changes that you need to fix it. The last thing you want in your life is regrets as a spouse or a parent!