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A few years back, Heather and I were talking to another couple about marriage and family. After a few minutes, the couple begin expressing some deep-rooted frustration that they held towards their kids, which actually bordered on resentment. Heather and I left the conversation saddened because there was not a single moment where the other couple said something positive about their kids.

Raising our children with Heather is one of the greatest joys of my life. I can remember the moment I held my oldest son for the first time. That was one of the pivotal, life changing moments in my life as I became a dad for the first time. Six children later, I wouldn’t trade our big family for anything. 

Loving my kids does not make things less complicated, frustrating and exhausting. We have amazing kids who love Jesus and make decisions, yet still make the same mistakes and any human would. The best way to describe raising 6 kids is messy. There are times when our house is messy, emotions are messy and the journey of raising our family is just plain messy. 

Despite the mess, Heather and I love our children and truly enjoy being their parents. There has never been a point where they have stopped being a blessing and become a burden. What has helped is that I have prayed repeatedly to see my kids the way that God sees them.

Psalms 127:3 states,

“Children are a heritage from the LORD, offspring a reward from him.” 

God created our children to be a blessing and reward from Him. That does not mean that sleepless nights, terrible two’s or teenage drama do not exist. As parents, we have to look past the difficult phases of our child’s life and continue to see them the way that God sees them.

When your toddler leaves a messy trail behind them in your freshly cleaned house, thank God that you have a child that is healthy enough to make a mess. When your teenager drops some attitude or sarcastic comment, thank God for the opportunity to raise, mentor and disciple your child for future success.

Change your perspective and look past the negative. Regardless of the phase of life, there is blessing there because your child is a blessing! If that is hard for you, begin to pray that you see your child the way that God sees them.